So we went to Vetro Art (Glass Blowing Studio) in Grapevine…down on Main St. It was great…I mean we go all the time, but it’s so awesome how they blow the glass, they do it so gracefully. It looks sooo easy, but I know it’s not. They have such amazing things, and surprisingly, their prices are really reasonable. Look at this Tree blown from glass with the roots and everything, beautifully detailed:
They have such amazing things. From paper-weights, calligraphy pens, jewelry, kitchen magnets, Vases :
bowls, abstract pieces and amazing kaleidoscope. I told Nick I wanted him to get me a kaleidoscope for Christmas. They are kind of expensive ($100-$200) but well worth it.
Anyone that lives in the Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex should definitely check it out. It’s so inspiring. If you’re not interested in classes, then stop by and watch the professionals blow beautiful sculptures for free!
it has been 3 weeks and 4 days now since I found my dad, Gordon, nearly dead. Every day he speaks more and more. I am so thankful that he knows who I am. He understands everything happening he is just in this world of confusion since he has no recollection of what happened to him. He thinks he laid down to go to sleep because he wasn’t feeling well, and woke up in the hospital, unable to breathe, tubes in every hole of his body, unable to speak, unable to move. Over the weeks I think he understands almost everything. The neurologist says that the part of the brain that is severely damaged is the part that makes the body function.
He is still unable to swallow; so he now has a feeding tube in his stomach. I try not to mention food around him, because anyone that knows my dad, knows that he fucking loves food more than anything. That’s one of the main reason’s he is in the hospital…because he said he wanted to live his life eating what he wanted to eat; regardless of his Type 1 Diabetes or his blood sugar.
Gordon: “Well at least I’ll die happy. I’d rather die eating what I want to eat and be happy, than watching every bite I take and being miserable.” < I don’t think he realized how selfish he was being at the time. And if he would at least check his blood sugar and take his medicine accordingly, it would be better than nothing. Yeah I know I’m stuck in the past, talking about what he COULD or SHOULD have done…
He can lift his head now and most of his chest. Apparently last night he tried to get out of the bed, lifted up his head and chest, raised his left leg up, bent his knee over the side of his bed and the next thing you know my Oma heard: “Mom, Help me!” -sure enough, my dad was laying on his right side on the wood floor. So now they have moved him directly in front of the main nurses station some minor restraints.
So yesterday I walked through the Lancaster Building @ about 12:11 pm on my lunch break, then I headed up the elevator, past the nurses station and into my dads new room. He was dripping with sweat, I cleaned him up, got a cold rag and put it on his forehead. I asked him if I could brush his teeth and he said yes, so I brushed them really well, put moisturizer in his mouth and chapstick on his lips.
The entire time he just stared at me with this look on his face that brought a tear to my eye. His expression was screaming: “why is this happening to me?! What have I done to deserve this?” I put my hand on his cheek and asked him what was wrong.
He replied: “I don’t want to do this anymore”< those were the clearest words I have heard come out of his mouth in the last 3 weeks.
Me: “I know daddy, but you can’t give up okay? I love you so much”
Gordon: “Take them out”
Me: “Take what out?”
Gordon: (pause…)he looked up confused and started shaking with frustration like he couldn’t think of a word…
then he said ” THE STRAWS”
(wait, what was he saying…I had to think, then I looked down at his hand and he had it on his IV. I guess by ‘straw’ he meant ‘tubes’.)
then he said again: ” I don’t want to do this anymore, take them out”
Me: “But I can’t daddy, I wish I could, because you know I’d do it in a heartbeat if it meant you were happy”
Then he closed his eyes. But I wasn’t going to act like we didn’t just have the conversation that we had. No way. This was a big deal.
Me: “Daddy”
Gordon: (he opened his eyes) “What?”
Me: “Recovery is going to be a long and slow process, but I need you to be strong dad, please, don’t leave me here like this! I want to have grandchildren and for you to see them. You’re too young daddy. I need you please be strong ” He closed his eyes again and I asked him:
“daddy, you’re going to come home with me right?…….right?!”
Gordon: “yesss…”
Me: “Promise me!”
Gordon: “Yes…”
Me: “no daddy, tell me you promise you won’t give up and that you’re going to come home…”
Gordon: “Promise…”
Me: “Oh daddy, I love you, smile please!”
At that moment, I saw the dad I had 3 weeks ago, happy. That was the first time I have seen him smile since he’s been in there.
It’s just like my favorite quote:
“Everything will be okay in the end,
if it’s not okay, then it’s not the end…”
I haven’t really had a chance to post anything about my dad. Well the good thing is, he is out of the coma and should make a full recovery…the bad thing is, it could take years. He knows everyone around him, he remembers the day before he went into the coma – but he’s missing like one week from his memory.
When he first came out of the coma he couldn’t talk or anything. We were stunned that he even opened his eyes since the doctor said he has pretty much no chance. I mean I always hear all the stories about “miracles” and all the bullshit, but I know hundreds if not thousands of people (not to mention 4-5 religions) were praying for him. I’ve never been very religious. I’m so skeptical about the whole thing. Anyways, The doctors were dumbfounded when they saw my dad with his eyes open, even more when he started to say a few words, now it’s been a little over a week since he opened his eyes and he can tell you exactly what he wants, when he wants it. He has a hard time moving his tongue around so it’s a little bit hard to understand him when he talks. Everyday he makes tremendous progress in his speech, swallowing, breathing and basic motor skills.
He seems to get aggravated with everyone he sees (especially if he knows them) he says to me: ” this is fucking bullshit, you piece of shit, you’re not helping me, I’m fucking hungry, why did you put me here?…” but I can deal with that…it’s better than lying there lifeless… he’ll get over it. I can’t feed him or give him and water because he can’t swallow. It’s an involuntary muscle that closes your trachea so food can go down the esophagus and into the stomach instead of the lungs. They feed him through an IV, but that doesn’t satisfy his appetite or thirst. He got a gastrostomy today which is a feeding tube in your stomach, but it’s only temporary. Hopefully next week, we will get him into a rehab close to the house.
I had really lost all hope, but thanks to everyone who prayed, a miracle brought my daddy from a “vegetated state” to “alive & kicking”
I found him yesterday, lying in bed. He was foaming at the mouth. When I touched him he was so hot, I didn’t know what to do. I was scared, worried, nervous, confused, angry…every negative feeling you could think of- I was feeling. I wanted someone to blame so bad…but the reality of it is, it’s no one’s fault.
I knew this day would come, but not this soon. It was just Saturday morning that he was here, at my apartment with me. Happy, laughing, singing, joking… He has diabetes, but he doesn’t take care of himself. When he eats, he eats candy, doughnuts, cookies, cereal…I have to remind him EVERYDAY to take his shot (insulin) to regulate his glucose (sugar). How can you forget to take your shot, you have to do it every day? -That’s what I wondered. But he was a kid at heart. In his mind…he had no worry in the world…he loved to work. He’s a master electrician. That’s all he ever did work, work, work…
My Oma (Grandmother) is in Germany. She is coming on an emergency flight and will be back tomorrow night. She’s going to be heartbroken. Her baby…he’s not okay. He has tubes coming out of every hole…he can’t breathe on his own. He’s in a coma, he hasn’t come out. He may not. I went to the emergency room the first day when they brought him…when he started throwing up blood, I couldn’t watch anymore. I couldn’t take it. Seeing my daddy like that. He doesn’t want to be like that. I know the nurses are taking good care of him though. He’s in ICU now. I can’t even type, I can’t think…everything comes out and I’m worried about my grammar, my spelling, my tone, dialect… but nothing makes sense as I’m typing it. I just hope someone will understand it.
I left the hospital yesterday and I came home and cried myself to sleep. I woke up and knew that I would cry myself to death if I kept on. So I took a shower, made a sandwich, and went back to spend time with my dad. The Neurologist hasn’t finished reading the EEG report, but he isn’t brain dead. He’s brain activity is “unusual” whatever the fuck that means. No one will tell me. He was squeezing my hand when I was holding it! Like he knew I was there…He knows I love him. But I feel guilty now. Because I feel like I should be crying and I’m not. I have no more tears in my eyes. I almost don’t feel any more pain. I don’t want to stop feeling it though. Even though I hate being sad, I don’t want to become oblivious to everything around me. It’s happening, it’s real…I can’t block it out. So now I am waiting… just waiting for something, anything to happen. So I’ll just hope for the best, and be prepared for the worst.
Ashli: “Daddy…I don’t know if I believe in God anymore…”
Gordon: “Well…there has to be SOMETHING. Wouldn’t you rather die believing, and find out there is no God…than die NOT believe, and find out there was?”
Ashli: “Well, when you put it that way, I would rather believe.”
[Chorus: Z-Ro singing]
Help me please
I’m blinded by my tears and I just cain’t see
So many devils tryin to recycle my soul
Cause in the ghetto where I’m from ain’t no positive roles
Just niggas and hoes
Send me a sign
Just to let a nigga know that he been on ya mind
Mmmmmm…
[Z-Ro]
Hmm, shit just be so fucked up out here in these streets mayne
You feel me? Straight up
This is the sea of life, and I’m drownin
I know I can swim, but feel like I keep sinkin down in
these waters and I cain’t breathe, I feel like I’m gon’ blow it
I can see people holdin a life jacket but they won’t throw it
Entertained by my struggle and they’d love to see me die
Why not love to see me live instead of helpin my family cry?
Like a homeless person with a sign, I would work for food
Ain’t no shame in bein helpless it’s a part of payin dues
On an everyday mission tryin to collect 5’s and 10’s
So many worries I promise my bones show right through my skin
Fancy cars and a mansion? That ain’t never been my goal
A hooptie would be fine, plus somewhere warm when it’s cold
I know what it feel like, not to be able to call the shots
Have a pen but no time to connect, all the dots
Therefore I do what I can do and then get down on my knees
Cause I can’t make it by my lonely, Jesus help a nigga please
[Chorus]
[Z-Ro]
Yeah, much love to everybody doin time
Up in Dominguez State Jail, you dig
Seem like soon as I’m findin happiness the joy’s gone
Kickin it with Steve Francis, Mike Tyson and Roy Jones
I waited my whole life to be somebody
But now I’ve gotta get a visit just to see somebody
I’m in this all white, reminscin all night, ’bout my cousin Trans
Wreakin havoc in this rap game, so it’s alright
Grandmother and my Auntie gettin everything they need
Trae’s an angel in my eyesight, a true friend in deed
While I’m waitin for heaven, I see hell and smell the flames
God send Abraham to quickly snatch me from this pain
I don’t really wanna die, just need a, change of scenery
I done see too many killings just like my vision is mean to me
And my eyes don’t like me, and my soul wanna leave me
I’m persecuted daily by my friends it ain’t easy
I do what I can do and then get down on my knees
I have so many enemies, Lord would you help me please
[Chorus]
[Z-Ro]
Nigga fuck Precinct 5, nigga and fuck Officer Thornton Berry
Punk-ass bitches, uhh
Tryin to survive for me, is like chasin the wind
You know you ain’t never gon’ catch it so why bother lettin yo’ knees bend
I try to stay around some realness, brothers and sisters holla if you feel this
If hurt and misery is who you chill with
Mo City my hood it forever be my block
Never thought I’d see the day it’d hand me over to the cops
Where the love from my homeboys, I love y’all too
I was the tugboat to ya problems cause I drug y’all through
Just one question dawg, how could you do me like that? I took your family in
I put some cash in ya pocket, made you a man again
But now it’s like you never knew me
Wouldn’t take the fall for y’all so now y’all wanna do me
I made it up out the hood and I ain’t comin back
Unless I’m brangin Lil’ Boss to get a hundred sack
Nigga I’m gon’ do what I’m gon’ do and then get down on my knees
And make a couple of G’s, but in God name, help a nigga to succeed
Earth Hour is a global event organized by WWF (World Wide Fund for Nature, also known as World Wildlife Fund) and is held on the last Saturday of March annually, asking households and businesses to turn off their non-essential lights and other electrical appliances for one hour to raise awareness towards the need to take action on climate change. Earth hour was conceived by WWF and The Sydney Morning Herald in 2007, when 2.2 million residents of Sydney participated by turning off all non-essential lights.[1] Following Sydney’s lead, many other cities around the world adopted the event in 2008.[2][3] Earth Hour 2010 took place on March 27, 2010 from 8:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m., at the participant’s respective local time.
How London Bridge will look during Earth Hour. (Photos: World Wildlife Fund)
Las Vegas’ Flamingo Hotel usually has a well-lit marquee featuring the current show
But during Earth Hour, the Flamingo will go dark. (Photos: World Wildlife Fund)
Nashville’s riverfront glows on a typical night
Nashville makes a stand on climate change during Earth Hour.
(Photos: World Wildlife Fund)
Careful. This is VERY graphic, but it’s a good study in what electricity can do – if you are stupid
Downtown Dallas job over the weekend. They were trying to pull a hot 13,200 volt copper wire out of a conduit. Note the bolt cutter and the copper wire on the ground. It still stinks out here! How the hell can they not know that this sub-station was super hot? No problem – they won’t bother one again!
So if you are stupid enough to fuck with hot wire, you’re a fucking dumbass. I have no empathy for you. It looks like only one of the guys was doing it and then the other tried to grab his friend…DON’T DO THIS! IF SOMEONE IS GETTING ELECTROCUTED, DO NOT GRAB THEM-IF THEY ARE HUNG UP ON A STRAIGHT CONNECTION, HIT THEM WITH A STICK. YOU WILL GET HUNG UP WITH THEM IF YOU COME INTO CONTACT WITH THEM. And for those of you (won’t mention any names) that I know that use a butter knife, saw-zaw blade, fork, or whatever to steal your electricity…You think you know what you’re doing but you have no fucking idea!
So now, if you die-or get electrocuted- don’t say you didn’t know.
I’m seriously starting to think I don’t want to have children.
If my child turned out like this…i would Fucking Kill Myself.
what the hell is wrong with you?
Wait!? So you’re telling me that everyone is going about theirbusiness; Like they haven’t noticed there is a Queer-Pedophile-Drag-Monstrosity with a beard and black Stripper-Shoes sitting in the same room as them?
Oh my dear, God. i just threw up in my mouth.
who the fuck are you supposed to be? Rainbow Brite?
….watch out, Easter is right around the corner. And when you take your kid to the park for an Easter egg hunt, and this guy will be waiting to kid nap your kids from the bushes…
This is Ashli 